A back-to-school message for the adults who listen

Blog by Jane Fraser, President, Stuttering Foundation

Every August, we make lists. Pencils. Notebooks. Backpacks. New shoes. Schedules. Forms. We prepare children for a new school year by trying to anticipate everything they might need.

For a child who stutters, I would add one more item to the list. It costs nothing, requires no shopping, and can change an entire school day: time.

Time to finish a sentence, to raise a hand without racing the answer, and to read aloud without feeling that the room is impatient. They also need time to decide how they want a teacher to respond when stuttering happens.

And perhaps most importantly, time to be known for much more than the way their words come out.

For decades, children who stutter have written to the Stuttering Foundation. Their letters are funny, candid, hopeful and sometimes heartbreaking. School appears in them again and again. One child wrote that he felt as if no one cared because he took too long to talk. Another offered advice every classroom should hear: "You should always say what you want to say in class and at home. What you have to say is important!"

Those two thoughts belong side by side. A child can have something important to say and still wonder whether the world is willing to wait for it.

That is why I think the first days of school offer adults a remarkable opportunity. Before habits harden, before a student decides it is safer not to raise their hand, and before classmates learn to fill every pause, a teacher can quietly establish what kind of listening will happen in that classroom.

This does not require turning stuttering into a classroom event. In fact, the best support is often wonderfully ordinary.

Listen to what the student is saying, not how fluently it is said. Do not finish words or sentences. Resist well-meant instructions such as “slow down” or “just relax.” Expect the same quality of thinking and work you expect from other students. Create a classroom where people take turns, interruptions are limited, and no one has to compete to be heard.

Then do something even more important: ask the student.

A private conversation early in the year can prevent months of guessing. You might say: "I want you to be able to participate fully in this class. I wonder…what we can do together to help make participating in class easier? I wonder if there are things I can do when you are called on to read aloud or give a presentation that would be helpful to you?"

The answer will not be the same for every child. That is the point.

One student may want to be called on exactly like everyone else. Another may want a little warning before reading aloud. A student may want classmates to know about stuttering; another may not. Needs can change as confidence grows. The goal is not to build a protective bubble around a child who stutters. It is to give that child a voice in decisions about their own voice.

Parents and speech-language pathologists can help make that conversation easier. A short note to a new teacher, a quick check-in during the first weeks, or a shared plan for presentations and class participation can turn three adults working separately into one team listening to the same child.

I also hope we can rethink what a "successful" school year sounds like.

Of course, good speech therapy matters. For generations, the Stuttering Foundation has worked to put expert information into the hands of families, teachers and speech-language pathologists. But a child's progress cannot be measured only by how many fluent sentences we hear. Progress may be a student finally asking the question they had been avoiding, or volunteering an answer even when they know they may stutter. It can also be something as everyday as laughing with friends at lunch, auditioning for the play, giving the presentation, or simply saying their own name without substituting another word.

Those moments matter because school is not merely where children learn subjects. It is where they learn whether their ideas belong in the room.

A teacher does not need to be an expert in stuttering on the first day of school. Curiosity, patience and good information can go a long way. Above all, it helps to listen.

The Stuttering Foundation has free back-to-school resources for parents and teachers on our website, including The ABCs of Stuttering, 8 Tips for Teachers, Notes to the Teacher, Dear Teacher, and materials featuring children who stutter in their own words.

As the new year begins, I hope every child who stutters finds at least one adult at school who sends a simple message without ever having to say it aloud: There is room for your voice here. Take the time you need. We are listening.

That may be the most useful school supply we can give them.